Brain games
by Scifikt
Summary: Another quick idea about Sam leaving SG-1.


The last five hours had Jack handling one crisis after another. Three teams had come in hot, the most recent was SG-6.

"What happened out there, Colonel?"

"The Goa'uld are trying what they can to survive but we've got another one cornered."

"That wasn't what it looked like from up here."

"Looks can be deceiving, General."

Jack shook his head, "Get to the infirmary and we can meet afterwards."

Jack was about to head to his office, hoping for a few minutes of peace when Walter looked up. "Sir?"

"Yes, Sergeant?"

"SG-1 is three hours over due."

Of course, Jack sighed, there would be no rest for the wicked. Chances are they tried to dial in on time but all the craziness over the last few hours meant the gate was busy when they tried. "Dial them up, Sergeant."

The gate spun, seven chevrons were locked, and the intense blue shimmer took hold. Harrimen reached out for the microphone, "SGC calling SG-1. Please report SG-1." He watched the clock and after thirty seconds he tried again and still got no response. He gave it a total of three minutes, repeating the request every thirty seconds.

"Get SG-3 and 8 in the briefing room in ten minutes."

Waiting was the worst part of desk duty, that and sending good people out to do ugly jobs. He paced in his office and kept coming out to look at the gate, as if staring at it would make it rotate. His shift was over, but he knew he couldn't leave until he had word back about SG-1. The promotion hadn't stopped him from thinking of them as his team.

An hour later the claxons blared as an unscheduled wormhole was announced. Jack was in the control room before the wormhole was established.

"SG-3s IDC sir."

"Open it up." He leaned forward on the console as Colonel Reynolds stepped through and gave him a head nod.

"We found them, sir."

Jack breathed a sigh of relief as all three teams stood in the gateroom. He smiled down at them and had his smile returned by a weary looking Daniel and Teal'c. Sam looked to her right, never making eye contact with him before heading to the infirmary.

Jack let three and eight go home after a short debriefing. They told him they had tracked the signals from SG-1's equipment to a bunker guarded by six soldiers. They took out the guards and infiltrated the bunker, where they found Daniel and Teal'c in a cell and Carter in a room strapped down to a table with three people standing around her. They zatted everyone and got SG-1 back to the gate, with Carter regaining consciousness about half way back.

Sam, Daniel, and Teal'c were given a clean bill of health in the infirmary and reported to the briefing room at almost 2200 hours. Everyone was tired, but Jack needed to be sure they were really ok before he could leave base. Sam sat to his left with Daniel and Teal'c to his right.

"How about tell me what happened out there."

All eyes turned to Sam, the team leader, but she was intently looking at her right index finger tracing a line along the nail bed of her left thumb. She did not look up. Daniel glanced at Jack.

"We detected an energy signature and thought we might have found one of the lesser Goa'uld hide outs. Turns out we found some kind of outpost. We never found out if they were the planet's inhabitants or if they were from somewhere else. They weren't a very talkative bunch. They had a machine that created images in our minds. I think they were trying to learn about us but after a few attempts the same scenario would play over and over with a few modifications."

"Such as?"

"One that repeated for me was being trapped as an Ancient, forced to watch each of you die. You died in different ways each time, but I wasn't able to help, and I couldn't take human form again."

"I was still in the service of Apophis. My son had joined me and been killed in battle."

All eyes again turned to Sam. "Carter?"

Jack reached out towards her and she flinched her arm as his hand got close. "Right, ummmmm, well, Ba'al used me as a host. I was trapped inside my own head and forced to watch as he used me to kill each of you and decimate Earth."

"Ok, so all of that sounds horrid. You know that when aliens poke around in your heads I have no choice but send you to the shrink."

Daniel shrugged, "We all know the routine by now."

"Indeed."

"In that case, I look forward to reading your reports." Sam pushed back from the table while Jack was talking and headed to the stairs. His eyebrows shot up. "I guess we're done and you're dismissed." Her head was below his vision by the time he was done talking.

Daniel and Teal'c were just as surprised by her hasty exit. Jack looked over at them. "They kept her in that machine a lot longer than either of us."

"More than our time coupled."

Jack narrowed his eyes, "Coupled?"

"He means more than our time added together."

"I figured as much Daniel." Jack looked back at the spiral stairs.

Jack grabbed an extra cup of coffee when he got to work the next morning and headed to Sam's lab. He was surprised to find the lights off and the room empty. He stopped by again on his way to lunch and found it in the same condition, so he called the front gate and confirmed she had not come to work today. He wished he could assume that meant she was taking a well-deserved day off to relax or have some fun, but he knew it probably meant something was really wrong. Jack called it a day a little early, knowing the paperwork could wait until tomorrow or even Monday. He picked up a bake at home pizza, beer, and ice cream before heading to Sam's.

Sam was curled up on her sofa with a book in her hand even though she was staring off into space when her doorbell rang. She glanced at her watch, 1732. She considered ignoring it but then the knocking started. She rolled off the sofa and shuffled to the door.

"Sir?"

"Good evening, Carter." He grinned as he held up his purchases. "I brought dinner."

She glanced down at the bags and kept her eyes off his face. "That's very kind but I'm not really hungry."

"You don't have to be hungry to enjoy moose tracks ice cream." He wiggled the bag on his arm. 'It'll melt before I can get home." The tension lines beside her face narrowed and he knew she was trying to think of a way out. He wasn't going to make it easier on her. "Common Carter, don't make me keep standing out here so long the beer gets warm."

Sam stood slightly to the right and moved back even further as he stepped over the threshold. He headed straight for the kitchen, putting the ice cream in the freezer and the beer in the refrigerator.

"If it's alright with you I am going to turn on the oven. I'm already a little hungry and shopping didn't help."

She stood in the doorway to her kitchen and watched him. "That's fine."

"Would you like a beer?"

"No, thanks." She shook her head. "I already have a drink." She nodded towards the living room. He peeked out and saw a glass of orange juice, which he assumed included some vodka as well.

"Another reason you need a little food. Go sit and I'll bring it to you when it is ready."

He came into the living room and sat in a chair across from where she was sitting on the sofa while he waited for the oven to heat up. He let her sit in silence and just watched the slump of her shoulders until the oven buzzed. When he returned from putting the pizza into the oven he decided he would use those fifteen minutes to get her to talk.

"You know why I'm here."

"You want to hear what happened."

"Yep."

"And what if I don't want to talk about it?"

"That won't really be an option. I mean you can tell me to hit the road tonight, but you won't be allowed back on activity duty until you've told us what happened and been cleared by a psychiatrist."

"Right, regulations and all."

His eyes narrowed, "Yeah."

"Fine, it's still the same as what I told you on base. They made me think Ba'al had taken me over, and I killed you and lots of other people over and over in an attempt to rule the planet."

"Perhaps you can expand upon that just a bit while we wait on dinner to cook." Sam let out a dramatic sigh. "Maybe start with all this killing."

"I usually killed Daniel and Teal'c before coming back through the gate and told you they'd been killed in a conflict of some type. You always believed me. I somehow always got through the medical exam without Ba'al being detected and then met with you to go over what happened. Sometimes I poisoned you and it was blamed on a heart attack. I pushed you down the stairs once and made it look like I was trying to catch you when you tripped. One time I just came through the gate firing and it worked, it always worked, no matter how ridiculous a plan it was. Even Ba'al would have come up with better stuff."

"So, you never thought any of it was real?"

She shook her head. "Not even once."

"Just because it was too easy to take over?"

"That was a big part of it, but it also just felt wrong."

"How?"

Sam took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "They build Ba'al's take over of my mind on my experience with Jolinar."

"Ok." That made sense to Jack.

Sam rolled her eyes. "I know this is hard to understand but Jolinar tried her best to not disturb me any more than necessary. She talked to me and tried to explain why this was happening. She helped me see how she was different and we ended up sharing stories. It took me a long time to really remember some of that but what I do remember wasn't scary after the first day or so. Don't get me wrong, I didn't help her, but I understood her."

"You assume it would be different with a Goa'uld than with a Tokra."

"I think that's a fair bet. Ba'al would prefer to taunt me as he killed my friends."

Jack rubbed his neck. "Yeah, that seems more like ole ball boy. My Tokra experience was a bit like you described but mine figured out pretty quickly to let me be. He said I was a grump."

Sam gave him a small fleeting grin. "I bet you gave him a lot of grief."

"Maybe, but he deserved it."

"True."

The oven buzz distracted them both. "I'll be right back." Jack went to the kitchen and searched around for what he needed while Sam sipped her drink. He returned with two plates and beer. He sat on the sofa with Sam, keeping an empty cushion between them. They sat in silence as they gave the pizza a chance to cool.

Jack finished his two slices while Sam was still nibbling on her first slice. "Not to your liking?"

Sam's brow furrowed. "Huh?"

"The pizza. You don't seem to like it."

"Oh, sorry, I'm just not all that hungry."

"Is that because of your second experience?" Sam dropped the slice of pizza she had been holding. "Daniel and Teal'c already turned in their reports so I know they put you through a series of experiences and ended up focusing on two different scenarios that repeated."

"Oh." She put her plate on the table in front of the sofa.

"Since you knew the one with Ba'al was fake it has to be the other one that's bothering you."

"I'm fine."

"Is that why you flinch every time I get close? Perhaps that's why you have no appetite. Maybe that's why you didn't come to work today."

"I just need a little time."

"Time and a chance to talk about it."

"Like you're one to give that advice."

"I understand I'm a huge hypocrite, but I have all night."

Sam pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them. She shook her head. "You're the last person I want to talk to about this."

"Then that probably means I'm the one person you should tell. There won't be any judgement."

Sam put her head down on her knees. She knew he was going to find out, one way or another, so he might as well hear it from her rather than rad it. "I wasn't part of the SGC, at least not any more. I was in private industry." She stopped to gather her thoughts. "We were…"

She turned her head away from him. "We were together, that's why I had left the SGC. I remember how you proposed and our wedding." She hugged her legs a little tighter. "We had a daughter, Elizabeth. You insisted on calling her Liz. She had your brown hair and my blue eyes, a dynamic combination really. You retired not long after she was born. You spoiled her rotten, she barely ever slept in her bassinet. You loved holding her and she would stare at you for hours. I'd come home, and you'd have no idea how late it was because you'd been playing with her."

She swallowed to hold back her desire to cry. "You built her a playhouse in the backyard, she loved the swings the most, especially when you were pushing. We took her to her first day of kindergarten together. You were lost that day. About a month after she started school you started working part-time training new SGC recruits. I remember her graduation from high school and college. You looked so handsome as you walked her down the aisle at her wedding." She couldn't hold back her sob. "We had the most beautiful grandchildren." She let the tears fall. "I wanted it to be real."

Jack looked away from her, hating to see her in such pain.

"Now you know, so you can go."

She felt movement on the sofa and assumed he was leaving but then his arm was behind her. "Come here." His arm went around her shoulders and he nudged her closer. She let herself be pulled in and collapsed against him. He rubbed her back as her tears left wet trails on his shirt. He held her until her shoulders stopped moving and her breathing slowed.

"We still have ice cream."

She sat up and tried to wipe her tears off his shirt. "Ice cream sounds good." Jack brought back two bowls with two generous scoops in each.

"Better?"

Sam ate another bite. "A bit."

"Good." Jack watched her take a couple more small bites. "You know you're going to have to tell the shrink that whole story on Monday, right?"

Her head popped up. "Monday?"

Jack nodded, "Yeah, not coming to work today raised some flags."

Sam let out a slow breath. "Ok, well…ok."

Jack reached out and put his hand on her knee. "Carter?"

"I didn't put your name in my report."

"Oh. Well, I guess that's one way to handle it." Sam looked away from him. "The shrink might insist on knowing. Are you going to lie?"

"I'm…I'm honestly not sure." She moved her spoon through the ice cream. "I'd…I'd thought I might say it was Pete."

Jack nodded again. "I guess that makes sense." He put his bowl down. "Let's say the shrink is satisfied and gives you the all clear, do you think you'll want to go right back out? I can work it out, so you don't have to."

Sam swallowed. "I've been thinking about that too." She sat her bowl down. "I spent the afternoon looking at transfer options."

Jack sat back and took his hand off her knee. "I see."

"Do you? Really?" She reached out towards him but kept her hand on the sofa. "When I look at you I miss a life I never had, and it hurts more than I care to admit."

"You'd leave the SGC to get away from me."

She started shaking her head, "That's…that's not exactly…"

"I'll retire, it's about time anyway."

Sam's head snapped up and she fixed a glare at him. "Not a chance. You're doing a great job and the SGC needs you."

"It needs you more."

She shook her head. "Not right now. I'll still do my science thing, just from a bit further off."

Jack reached out and picked up both bowls, "Let me get these cleaned up." After he rinsed the bowls and put them in the dishwasher he wiped off the already clean counters. He turned off the light and stepped back into the living room. "The kitchen is all cleaned up, so I should probably be getting out of your hair." He turned away from her and stepped toward the door.

"Jack." He stopped moving, keeping his back to her, and put his hands in his pockets. "They picked you because they knew how I felt about you and those feelings haven't changed." He closed his eyes. She pushed herself up off the sofa and stepped towards him as he slowly turned. "I don't want to lose you." He opened his eyes and his arms at the same time, knowing it had been hard for her to admit her feelings. She stepped into his arms, putting her head on his shoulder.

He wrapped his arms her as her arms moved up to his neck. "You'll never lose me."

She sighed and slightly relaxed. "Maybe after I transfer I could call you every once in a while, and we can talk."

He grinned, "Talking, great, my Achilles heel." She gave a quiet snort of laughter. He shifted backwards so she raised her head from his shoulder. He put a hand on the side of her face. All he wanted to do was close the gap and capture her lips with his, but he knew the time wasn't right yet. "I don't see any reason to wait until after you transfer. How about I call you when I get home tonight and let you know I made it safe and sound."

Her lips spread into a beautiful grin that made her eyes sparkle. "I'd like that."

After he left she locked up and turned out the lights. She took her book to bed. She placed her bookmark and closed her book before reaching over and answering the ringing phone. Seeing his number made a warmth spread through her chest.

"Hello."

"I made I home, safe and sound as promised."

"That's good to hear."

"I was thinking on the way home that I could use a good bedtime story, maybe something about a time when little Sammie Carter got in trouble."

She grunted. "I've hated being called that since I was four, that's when I figured out my mother spelled my name with an ie and my preschool teacher spelled it with a y."

"Of course, it was how it was spelled that got to you."

"I assumed my mother was doing it the right way but no matter how many times I wrote it with an ie in class my teacher kept writing it with a y. I decided the easiest solution was to insist on being called Samantha. My mother reluctantly went along with it and she told my brother to do the same. That meant every time she wasn't around he would call me Sammie and I would try to hit him."

"Were you able to take him?"

"I rarely won but I always got in a few good licks and since I was younger and smaller he was the one who usually got in trouble, especially if I managed to cry."

"The power of little girl tears."

"I guess. I'd been telling everyone to call me Samantha for about a week when my dad got back from assignment. He told me Samantha was too big a name for such a little girl and he kept calling me Sammie, which made my brother a bit bolder too. After a couple days I decided if he wasn't going to call me Samantha I wasn't going to call him Daddy."

"Uh oh. What did you decide to call him?"

"I went with Colonel, I even included a salute every time I said it."

"Probably your best bet given the alternatives. How did he react?"

"He taught me the right way to salute him. I remember one night at dinner when I called him Colonel he told me I needed to stand up and salute him every time I said it. He thought that would make me give up but it just strengthened my resolve. The next night my parents had some friends over and I decided that was the right time to call him Jake."

"Oh no."

"Yep, the whole room went silent and all eyes turned to him. I held my ground but the look on his face terrified me. My mother broke the tension with an offer of a drink for the adults as she nudged me to the side. I spent the rest of the night in my room and I fell asleep before their friends left. Hunger was the only thing that got me out of my room the next morning. He was waiting for me in the kitchen. He poured me a bowl of cereal and called me Sam."

"Seriously?"

"Yep, I went back to calling him Dad, and occasionally Daddy, and everyone took to calling me Sam. My name was set by the time I started kindergarten and I never changed it again."

"I can totally see little pigtailed Sammie with her hands on her hips demanding to be Samantha. Thanks for sharing."

"Tomorrow night you'll tell a story."

"Deal."

It had been two months since Sam transferred and their nightly conversations had become the norm.

"Good evening, Jack."

"How was your day today?"

"A couple squabbles over budget but otherwise all was calm, and I got a lot done. How about you?"

"Nothing too dramatic, one team came in hot, but the pursuers had wooden arrows. Not much match for Kevlar."

She snickered. "Not at all."

"I rented a portable storage unit for the move. I'll be able to pack here, and the unit will be waiting for me when I get to DC. That will let me take a couple weeks off and go to the cabin"

"Not a bad plan."

"Any chance you could get a little time off and join me at the cabin."

"I have plenty of leave built up. How about I fly up and meet you at the cabin and then ride with you to DC and help you get moved in."

"That sounds perfect."

He met her at the small airport two hours from the cabin.

"It's good to see you." He reached out for her bag, but she kept it on her shoulder.

"It's good to see you too. I've got another bag to pick up. I hope that isn't too much luggage."

He shook his head. "I saved space in the truck for you." They got her second bag. "I thought we'd spend the afternoon in town, get dinner, and make a grocery store stop before going to the cabin."

"Sounds good to me." It took about an hour to get to town. They chatted and after about fifteen minutes he reached over and put his hand on hers. He stopped at a small park. They walked a path until they reached a small bridge over a pond. Sam stopped and leaned on the rail of the bridge. Jack put his arm around her waist and leaned in beside her.

"Do you think these fish ever wonder if there is anything beyond their pond?"

He shook his head. "Nope, I think they look for food, try to make lots of babies, and avoid getting eaten."

"Just the basics."

He shrugged. "That's pretty much me, I'm a fish."

She put her hand on his, "Eating, sex, and avoiding being killed? I think there's a bit more too you."

"I'm a fish that's been dragged out of the pond and forced to see there's more, but I'm still basically a fish." He lifted his hand from hers and caressed the side of her face. "Luckily for all of us fish, there are people like you who do see what's outside our pond." Their eyes locked and he moved in, capturing her lips in a slow kiss. When the first kiss ended Sam straightened and turned towards him, so their second kiss was deeper and longer than the first one, leaving them both breathless.

After the park they walked through downtown, stopping for dinner at a pub that featured a great reuben. After dinner they stopped for groceries before finally heading to the cabin. Jack brought Sam's bags in while she grabbed several bags of groceries. Jack put her bags in the hall and went back for the cooler that contained the perishable groceries.

Sam had more than half of the bags unpacked by the time Jack got the cooler inside. She switched gears and started putting away the perishables while Jack put the cans in their appropriate spots. Jack put the last of the cans away and turned to look at Sam placing the milk in the refrigerator. He leaned back on the counter.

"I'll take your bags to the guest room."

"Oh….ok." Sam glanced over her shoulder and she put orange juice in the refrigerator.

"Is something wrong?"

Sam closed the refrigerator and turned towards him. "No, of course not. It's just…"

He pushed off the counter. "Just what?"

Their eyes locked. "What if I don't want my own room?"

He pulled her into his arms. "I had to offer even though I had hoped otherwise."

Sam smiled, "I'm glad I didn't pack my lingerie for no reason."

Jack's eyebrows rose. "There's lingerie?"

"Enough to make the TSA agent blush." He put his hand on the back of her head and moved in for a long deep kiss. "If we're done in here we could move to the bedroom."

"There's one thing I need to do first." His right hand moved to the top button on her shirt and slipped it open. "That button has been my archnemesis all day." His eye twinkled at the sight of her cleavage. "Wow, I assume that isn't exactly standard issue."

"Oh, absolutely not. It's way more uncomfortable than my usual bras."

His brow knitted. "If it's uncomfortable why are you wearing it."

"For the reaction I just got. It comes with matching panties too."

"So, you're wearing them for me?" Sam placed her hand on his chest as she nodded. "Which means as you were getting dressed this morning you were thinking about me undressing you."

She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Yep, and I still am."

"Never let it be said I was one to disappoint."

A couple hours later Sam was curled against his side and he was rubbing her thigh, which was lying across his legs.

"You are an amazing woman."

"We are amazing together. I'm just glad it wasn't awkward."

Jack lifted his head and twisted it, to try and get a look at her face, which was lying on his chest. "You thought I was going to be awkward?"

Sam snickered as she pressed her face against his neck. "That wasn't exactly what I meant."

"Are you laughing at me?" His hand slid up to her waist and he pulled her closer to him. "You thought I was going to be awkward in bed and you're laughing at me."

"No, no, no." She lifted her head and looked him in the eye. "I was worried our years of working together might make things weird, but that was definitely not the case." She spread her hand on his chest and slid it over to his shoulder and down his arm. "I also assumed you would be able to do amazing things with these hands and I was right on that account."

"Hmmmm." He flexed those fingers on her waist. "You usually have a better average than 50/50 when making guesses."

She kissed his neck. "I guess you have thrown me off a little bit."


End file.
